So, Mindy has lost her purse which has her keys, wallet, and phone in it. She cannot get into her apartment and does not have her wallet to pay for a hotel, so the only logical solution is for her to spend the night at Danny’s apartment … because who wouldn’t want an excuse to spend the night with Dr. Castellano.
Mindy is upset that she doesn’t have anyone right now, but Danny assures her that it is way better to be single because there is no long hair in the drain and no one uses your toothbrush. He asks Mindy who she is currently crushing on because he wants to know who her “next victim” is. She says that she can’t tell him because they work at the same place, and he is out of her league. Mindy is clearly talking about Lawyer Cliff, but Danny assumes that she is talking about him.
[Pause: I like Cliff. He is funny and a lawyer, so that’s good. But can he please get a haircut? The messed up rooster look is just not doing it for me. I miss Pastor Casey!!!!]
When they make it back to Danny’s building, Mindy notices that Danny smells good and asks if he is wearing cologne. Danny has a minor freakout: No. No, no, no. I don’t smell good. It’s deodorant. Whatever. Leave me alone.” Then, they run into Danny’s crazy ex-hookup neighbor that is now obsessed with him. Danny tells Mindy to hold his hand and pretend to be his girlfriend. But, of course, Mindy takes it too far and tells her that Danny has found true love, that she is Danny’s fiancée, and she is pregnant with his child. She makes up a very elaborate story about how they met – it is way too detailed, so obviously this is a fantasy that she has thought about before. Oh, and her fictitious name is Chloe Silverado.
Danny tries to make Mindy sleep on the couch, but I guess she doesn’t want to. So, she barges into his room (wearing a baseball glove, for some reason) and jumps in the bed with him.
When Danny turns on a horror movie, Mindy gets scared and latches onto Danny. Danny tells her that they need to talk, and Mindy starts admitting that she farted and accidentally spilled red wine and chocolate syrup on his couch. Danny tells her that they need to talk about “us,” but he can’t talk to her in his bed. They get up to go into the living room to talk, but scary neighbor Amy is waiting on them. Amy reveals to Mindy/Chloe that she was having a lot of sex with Danny while Mindy/Chloe was pregnant with their child.
Amy gives lots of details about her escapades with Danny, and also reveals that she had a key to his apartment and that Danny would make her pancakes. Mindy pulls Danny aside and tells him that he is not the player that he claims to be. He admits that he gets lonely sometimes, “You know, if it’s a little drizzly out, or if I see photos of the first family doing that Easter Egg Hunt.”
Mindy sits Danny and Amy down and forces Danny to apologize to Amy for leading her on because he was lonely. Amy accepts his apology, but tells Mindy that she has a lot more to be mad about than she does.
When Danny accidentally calls Mindy, “Mindy” (Amy thinks her name is “Chloe”), Mindy and Danny have to prove to Amy that they are an actual couple. And we get this brilliantly beautiful scene.
Amy buys it, and says that of course their love is real because Danny never looked at her like that. Awwwww! Will these two just hurry up and love each other already?!?!?
The next morning, Danny makes Mindy pancakes. Still thinking that Mindy has a crush on him (and not Cliff), he says, “You know that guy you were you were telling me about? The one you work with. I think you should know that he’s not out of your league. You’re great. I mean it.” Mindy mentions that she will ask Cliff out, and Danny is super sad that she wasn’t talking about him.
Back at the hospital, Morgan and Peter stumble upon Mindy’s purse and decide to go through her phone, and she has a text from Cliff. Morgan says that Dr. L can just text him back tomorrow when she gets her phone back, but Peter shouts, “You’ve got to text him back right now! If a girl doesn’t respond to me immediately, that means she’s either stuck up, dead, or living in an elevator – all three of which are deal breakers.” Morgan and Peter decide to play matchmaker and text Cliff back. They are impressed with how quickly Cliff is responding to
Mindy’s their texts and realize that Cliff may really like Mindy. They get a little excited when Cliff and “Mindy” exchange winky face texts.
I guess Morgan and Peter decide to play hard to get, so they don’t text Cliff back for a little while. Then, Cliff has this great scene – something that we have all done a time or two – a “check your phone dance.” He checks his phone over and over again wondering why
Morgan and Peter Mindy hasn’t texted him back. Finally, he gives in and texts Mindy again – a simple, “What are you up to now?” Peter and Morgan decide to turn this convo from “texting” to “sexting,” with a scandalous, “What are you wearing?” He replies, “A sweater and sweatpants. You?” Morgan writes, “A tasteful cardigan, corduroy slacks, and a breast cancer awareness pin.” Then Peter quickly adds, “And no panties.” Surprised, Cliff responds, “That sounds really hot.” And Peter and Morgan shout, “Yes!!” Then, Cliff adds, “I’m coming over.” And Peter and Morgan shout, “NOOOOOOOO!!!!!”
When Cliff arrives at Mindy’s apartment, Peter and Morgan have thrown an impromptu Veteran’s day Party to cover up their false texting convo. And, Morgan runs into Heather (Ellie Kemper, the girl that Josh was cheating on Mindy with) in the hall and invites her to the party. Peter tells Cliff that Mindy is out on a salsa run, but when she is gone too long, he texts Mindy to ask where she is. Peter responds, “I am back and in the bathroom giving this loofah the workout of its life. I want to be really clean for you Cliff.” Oh, Lord. Peter has taken this way, way, way too far. But, Cliff seems to like the sexting.
When Mindy is gone for too long, Cliff gets restless and says that he is leaving, but Morgan and Peter force him to talk to Heather, who talks and talks and talks and doesn’t let him leave. He finally tires of Heather and goes to find Mindy in the bathroom. Of course she is not in there, and Morgan and Peter finally admit to him that they were the ones texting him. He tells them to delete all of the texts so that Mindy doesn’t see them, and then leaves the party with Heather.
The next day in the office, Morgan gives all of Mindy’s stuff back to her, and she discovers all of the texts to Cliff.
And the episode ends. I guess that we will see how she reacts next week, although she looks pretty pissed off already…
Mindy to Morgan: I need you to stop using your ability to have sex with me as a barometer for how I should dress.
Morgan (to the First Runner-Up of Miss Universe): You were so good in the interview. My favorite hobby is also activities.
Mindy (referring to Cliff): He’s with the second hottest woman in the universe. I’m not even the second hottest woman on the floor. Especially since Doug became Desiree.